My kids make life worth living,
actually that is an understatement. They make life to be a big adventure, a
spiritual experience and they make me look at the world with compassion, love
and forgiveness. My first born who will be turning twelve years of age has
taught me a lot about life. First let me be honest and say I have not always
felt this way.
My son was always energetic,
hyper for lack of better words, could not sit still or concentrate. He did
things in his own way, in his own time and that usually meant that he could
just wonder off in public places, creating uneasiness and chaos for me. Needless
to say the early years of his life I spent them in panic, anxious, running
after him in crowded malls, supermarkets and big retail stores. When he was
diagnosed with Petit-mal epilepsy, ADHD and later Asperger syndrome I actually
felt and thought it must have been a punishment from God. I spent a lot of my
time asking the wrong or unproductive question. Why me? What is it that I did
to deserve this?
The truth is “why me” prevents
you from learning and growing as a person. When you spend your energy asking
the wrong question you miss an opportunity to grow learn and get to closer to
the fulfillment of your purpose or evolve and become fully the person God meant
you to be. My little girls who turns four this year is a complete opposite of
his brother. She is the life of the home, always full of a smile, when she was
a few months old we used to call her smiley, she is already speaking two
languages, potty training her was easy, she is always in a good mood. Needless
to say it would be easy to gravitate towards her.
Ever since she was born I started
asking myself question, not just asking question but clearing my thoughts and
being observant enough to receive the answer and embrace the lessons that both
my kids are here on earth to teach me. My son may not be a” by the book” child,
his social skills developed slower than kids his age, he does not read
people’s faces or show emotions as expected. He has taught me patience(I have not mastered it yet LOL), he has
taught me to think outside of the box. I have had to learn creative ways of
teaching him what comes to you and me naturally. Yet despite of all his
challenges there are spontaneous and charming things about him, he loves to
read, he enjoys swimming, he loves to play electronic games and at the age of eleven he still enjoy cartoons. He has a very sharp memory for things that matters
to him (What that basically translate to is he will remember the names of the
soccer players in the Spain squad that was playing in the FIFA 2010 but will
not remember the details of his school homework, much to my frustration). The advantage is that when parents with kids
his age have to battle preteens who are fashion conscious, he is content with a
game or a book to read. Over the years I have tried in many ways, conscious and
unconscious to push him to where I thought he should be, in a way
sending a message that he is not acceptable. Lately I have learned to do
everything in my power to send a message that you are okay the way you are, you
are loved and accepted. After all that is all every human being under the sun
would like to hear. That is all that I want to
hear from people around me.
My daughter is the darling, she
is playful, full of joy and people are drawn to her. She is outspoken and free. There is one line
that everyone who meets my her seems to share, I am sure you were like her
when you were growing up. There are day were I can easily relate to that, and
there are days when it is harder. Life can make you forget, the challenges,
hard ache, pain and disappointments can make us get lost. The busy life we lead
can make us forget to stop and appreciate our strength and the little things
that makes life worth living; we end up so uptight and drained. When I look in to my daughter I see life and
sunshine. I see hope, I am forced to reconnect with my inner child and play.
My son teaches me patience, with
him and with others, he teaches to love unconditionally, he teaches me to
nurture and to learn to be kind with him and also with myself. My daughter brings out the fun side of me; the
adventurous care free girl always comes out to play when I see her. I guess my
friend’s tweet of saying a mother’s love is always whole even when divided is
the truth. When it is all said and done
I cannot help but think that every person in my life has a lesson to teach me
or a character to develop in me. I must just open my arms and be ready to
embrace the lessons.
